Monday, January 26, 2009

Make me smile

This is going to be a quick post, but I just had to share something special that happened to me this afternoon.

One of the things I struggle with most in life is anxiety. I get this broken record that plays in my head and tells me that I'm a failure at everything from my job to fitness to doing the dishes. It's one of the things I pray about the most because I know God truly does not want me to stress out about because the person behind my in Trader Joe's might have to wait for 3 extra minutes because I can't bag all my groceries (yes, I know it's technically the cashier's job) and pay for them at the same time. But this post is not about that. It was going to be about that, but then something special happened.

I was getting ready to swim, and I had all these "I wishes" running around in my head. "I wish I were more confident at work. I wish I were a faster runner. I wish I were more motivated to swim..." And then all of a sudden this song popped into my head.

If you are a child of the '90s, you'll remember it and laugh. If you aren't, I hope you appreciate it for what it is. A song about a guy who wishes a lot of things that just aren't going to happen. And that was all I needed to break the record. I haven't said anything about this on the blog, but I'm trying very hard to "step out in faith" about my whole anxiety thing. And I truly believe that God has a sense of humor, and He can give us exactly what we need at exactly the right time.

Anyway, that was perfect for me. I hopped in the pool and had a great swim. So from now on, when I get into that "I wish" cycle, I'm going to sing a few bars of that song to myself and smile about how silly it is to wish for things that can't be.